Thursday, November 24, 2011


Happy Thanksgiving! 
Don't fall out of your chair but it's Nikki here today! (I've been MIA since August.) I can't believe its been been that long... I feel odd just sitting down long enough to write this. Often when I'm sad, mad or depressed I get busy, cleaning out drawers, dressers, organizing closets, treating my wooden tables, seriously crazy stuff. I'm not much of a lay in bed depressed person, which there is nothing wrong with that, I actually wish I could do that too but I'm a little worker bee that has to keep busy. 
For those of you that do not follow me on facebook and are wondering why I've been gone for so long and why I'm so sad is because my grandma died in September. My mom and I moved in with her the day she came home from the hospital and went on hospice. We lived with her for a month, we never left her side, we celebrated her life everyday and we were both with her when she took her last breath. Its been so difficult to let go and say goodbye. I have a few pictures to share with you.
In this picture, my mom, my gmas baby sister and I had a spa day for my grandma, we dressed her all up with makeup and in some of her pretty clothes.

In these two pictures my mom and I had a "this is your life" play for her. We dressed in her clothes, danced and sang songs. It was such a wonderful night. 

My sweet Alfred never left her side. He went to live with her back in April when her dog max died. We let him live with her so she wouldn't be alone, not knowing it would be such a short period of time. 
Alfred had a job to do and he did it right to the very end. She loved him and he loved her. This is the last picture of them together the day she died. It just breaks my heart. 

Its been a rough fall to say the least. Some days are easier than others. Today was a rough one for me. Tonight I used my grandma's apple pie dish, she's had for years, I baked an apple pie in it tonight in her memory. I can't believe she won't be at my mom's house tomorrow when I get there. 

I'm so very thankful that I had a job that allowed me to move in and live with my grandma and a husband that encouraged me spend every waking moment with her in her final days. That's what I'm most thankful for this year.

I also want to thank all of you that sent me facebook messages, emails, cards and gifts after my grandma died. I can't tell you how nice it was to come home to all the love and support from all of you. Thank you so much! 

Also we have a fun giveaway over on my Facebook business page, go check it out to win some "Nikki Sivils" product for the holiday's. 

I hope all of you have a fantastic Thanksgiving with your families! 
Happy Turkey Day! -Nikki


Jennifer Matott (Sigmagirl) said...

Happy Thanksgiving! I was in tears reading that. Such precious memories! You will hurt for a long time, but you will remember all those sweet memories too! I lost my Nana when I was in high school and it ripped my heart out that I would not have her here to see me through all my milestones but truly believe she is here with me in spirit! Hugs to you and your family at the holidays!!

Julie Tucker-Wolek said...

Happy Thanksgiving Nikki, Dan and Henry!! And all the fur babies too!! I hope your day is magical and filled with loving memories of your Grandma! :):):):):):):):):):):):)

Liz said...

Gobble gobble till u wobble
Enjpy your time and u have all those memories it so hard to say goodbye.... They always stay alive in your heart

holly martin said...

Just read your blog and it left me in tears. You are an amazing person. I am sure your grandmom is looking down at the wonderful apple pie and sending you love.

Keep smiling.

Mary Pat Siehl said...

Happy Thanksgiving! I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my father coming up on 3 years now -all i can say is that it gets easier. I still have good and bad days. Knowing my youngest son will never know his grandfather but then I focus on all the wonderful memories that I have of him. The wonderful memories will get you through the sad times and your wonderful pictures. Cherish those memories!

Hope you have a wonderful thanksgiving!

DebC said...

As I am reading your post tears are streaming down my face. This is such a touching story to me. I fortunately haven't lost someone close to me and my father underwent a triple bypass in April. He is doing much better but that really sent a shock to my system. It also touches me greatly the story of Alfred. Animals are so precious and give every ounce of love they can and this makes me sad for your family and for Alfred who also loved her. I don't know if you read the story online about the elderly Chinese man who passed and his dog will not leave the grave site. He won't eat and he doesn't dare leave. That shows you the depth of these sweet animals love and breaks my heart. I have two little furbabies myself and they mean the world to me. I'm so glad he could bring some extra love to your grandmother before she passed. My sympathies to you and your family. That was very sweet what you did for her.
Deb C

Linda Beeson said...

I had to smile as I read your post because I saw all of the memories that you already had and that you guys were able to create before she left you. What a blessing to have her in your life!

Michelle H. said...

This brought tears to my eyes!
I just was going through some pictures of my grandmother that died 7 years ago.
Our daughter who will be 7 soon saw them and asked about her.
I still miss her very much we were very close.
What beautiful memories you have of your grandmother!!
Love the pictures!!
I do the same thing when Im frustrated, mad or discouraged I clean closets, ect. too! I get a lot done!!
Big hugs to you and your family!!

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